Rent Revisited
by reststillunwritten
Summary: Loosely based on the musical RENT. Roger and Mimi's relationship retold. His anger and fear of starting a relationship and actually living a life after the death of his girlfriend and the discovery of his disease.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer. So, this was my second try as a writer of fan fiction. Not sure I get the rules right. First: don't own anything, just write cause i got nothing better to do. Second: the story is based on Rent's characters but i'm not very faithful to their original biographies or the play/movie's timeline. Is it ok to call it a fan fiction, then? Not sure. Put it here anyway. Hope you enjoy. :-)**

Roger threw the guitar on the floor with anger. No songs were going to be written tonight. He was feeling too bad to even begin to play something he already knew. Composing, then, was totally out of question.

Today is has been exactly six month since he found out he was sick. It has also been six months since he found his girlfriend, April, dead in the bathtub of her apartment, with her slit wrists. Considering the important date, he decided to sulk all night - maybe all week - inside the apartment.

His roommate, Mark, was shooting something for his breakthrough film in the park nearby. Even thought it was almost 2 in the morning.

There was a knock on the door. He thought that was very strange, he wasn't expecting anyone and Mark would have warned him if he had invited anyone to the apartment. He knew how bad company Roger was when he was sulking like that.

He opened the door carefully. Leaning on the wall of the corridor there was a brunette woman. She was dressed with a very revealing and tight black silk dress. It was impossible for him not to stare at her perfect athletic body, especially at her very inviting cleavage.

"Good evening. Sorry to bother you." - her voice made him stop staring at her breasts and look at her face. She had a beautiful face. Her hair was long and very wavy, and it was a little messy. Her big brown eyes were very glassy and he realized she should be very drunk, maybe even high on something other than alcohol.

Since he hadn't said anything, just kept staring at her, she decided to continue. "It's just that I lost my key and I can't get into my apartment through the door. It would be ok if I went through the window of your apartment to the fire escape stairs?"

"What?"

She stepped into his direction and lost her balance, almost falling on the floor. He held her up by the arm and waist, preventing the fall.

"Are you ok?" - he asked.

She stood up and smiled to him. "Yeah. Just a little dizzy. Hadn't eat much today."

He watched her stepping away from him a little unsure. She entered the apartment, even without an invitation. "So, It's ok if I go through the window?"

"Wait. How do I know if you live downstairs? I've never seen you before."

She stopped in the middle of the living room and looked back at him still standing by the door. "How do I know if YOU live here? I've never seen you either and I've been living in this building for three months. I thought the cute guy with the glasses lived here." she said, stumbling in some words and pointing a finger to him. "What was his name? Something with A, I think." she put her finger to her lips and rolled her eyes thinking. "Jack?" she tried narrowing her eyes.

"Mark. He's my roommate."

"Yeeessss. Mark." She said snapping her fingers. "Dark hair, cool glasses, about my height. He was nice. Met him by the mailboxes. He didn't mention you." She point the finger again in his direction and walked two steps closer. Then she stopped. "Ow." she said closing her eyes and giving one step back without balance.

Roger walked in her direction and grabbed her before she could fall. He put her in the couch and made her lie down.

"What did you take?" He asked, pulling her legs up.

She opened a small crack in her eyes and twisted her mouth. "I don't talk to strangers." She said.

"Hey." he yelled at her. "This isn't funny. You're at my house. I need to know what you took to see if you need a doctor or just a cold shower."

She moaned, rolled to her side and said "Just need quick nap. I'll be out the window after, ok?" the last part was practically a whisper.

"No, no, no. You're not going to sleep here." She pulled her up but she was limp. "Hey. Hey, wake up." he called, shaking her.

She moaned again something incomprehensible and passed out.

Roger let go of her, realizing she needed to sleep her drunkenness off. He sighed, moved to the chair next to the couch and looked at her.

Her dress was pulled up allowing him to see the upper part of her leg. She was wearing a lacy pantyhose that made the sight even more disturbing. He felt something he thought he would never feel again. The surprise of that feeling lasted only a few seconds and he shook the thoughts he was having off saying to himself that it didn't matter.

It didn't matter that his body didn't realize it was already dead. His mind knew better. His mind knew he wouldn't act on the desires his body was feeling right now. His mind knew that those were just reflexes his body was used to.

He pulled her dress down and went to the bedroom to pick up a blanket. He removed her shoes and covered her completely. Then, he went to the kitchen to make some tea.

* * *

Mark entered the apartment around 3 am. Roger was sitting at the armchair next to the couch reading a book.

"Hey, you're still up." he said before he noticed the woman sleeping at the couch. "What's that?"

"That is our downstair neighbor, i think." he said in a very annoyed tone of voice. "She said she met you once by the mailboxes."

"Yeah, she moved in about three months ago. I told you I met her, haven't i? Why is she sleeping in our couch?" he said putting down his bag with the camera on the table.

Roger put the book down and stood up walking in Mark's direction.

"She lost her key and wanted to go through our window to the fire escape stairs to enter her apartment."

"Oo.K. Then why is she here?"

"She didn't make it to the window. She was so wasted that she passed out half way."

Mark laughed.

"This isn't funny." Roger said angry and annoyed.

Mark was used to Roger coarseness and it didn't bother him. A long time ago he decided to ignore it completely and act like they were having a normal conversation. At least they were having a conversation. Two months ago Roger just exchange monosyllabic answers to his questions. In his point of view, Roger was still healing from the facts that changed his life six months ago. At some point he would go back to be well again, that just didn't happened yet. But he was his best friend, a real brother, and Mark was not going to give up on him just because he was in a constant bad mood.

"Oh, it's very funny. I'm sure you'll realize that someday."

Roger rolled his eyes and shook his head impatiently. "I don't remember you saying you met her." he said.

"Didn't I? I guess I did. You probably weren't paying attention. Her name is Mimi, right?" - he sat on the chair Roger was before and looked more carefully at her.

"I don't know. She didn't introduce herself before invading our apartment and passing out on the couch."

"She's cute."

"Yeah, she said you were cute too. You'll make a lovely couple." Roger said now very angry. "I'm going to sleep. She's your problem now." he picked up his guitar from the floor and stormed out the living room into his bedroom, closing the door behind him.

That stroke Mark as strange. The constant bad mood didn't have many outbursts of rage. Most of the time Roger just complained about everything or said he didn't care.

He decided to go to sleep too and leave her there. If she was as wasted as Roger had said, she would probably sleep until the afternoon and there was nothing much he could do.

* * *

When Roger woke up he tried to listen the sounds of the house to see if there was any sign of live. Normally he would hear the sound of Mark making something in the kitchen or playing with his computer, editing the last footage he had made.

This time there was nothing. The place sounded empty. He stood up and went outside his bedroom into the living room.

His first glance was at the couch. There was no one there, just the tangled blanket. Then he looked at Mark's bedroom direction. The door was open and Mark wasn't inside. He felt relieved he was alone.

He went into the bathroom, pied, washed his hands and face, took some of the medication he needed to take with an empty stomach, and went back to the kitchen to make some breakfast. On the counter there was a note with a handwriting he didn't recognize.

"Sorry for last night. Thanks for everything. Mimi, your downstair neighbor."

He made some coffee, some eggs, and poured the last of the cereal that were in the box. He wondered were Mark was and thought about calling him, but didn't.

After he ate he sat on the couch. He closed his eyes and remembered her sleeping there. He didn't know why he was doing that, just could help the thoughts from coming. His hand brushed on the cushion she had laid her head and he brought it up to his face smelling it. There was a faint sweet perfume on it.

He heard the door opening and quickly put the cushion down and stood up.

"Hey. Good morning." Mark said closing the door behind him and going to the kitchen to pour some coffee for him. "Where is the sleeping beauty?"

"Guess she went home. When I woke up she wasn't here anymore. She left a note on the counter." - he pointed, sitting on the armchair and grabbing his guitar. He started tunning it.

"When I left she was still sleeping." Mark said reading the note.

"Where were you?"

"Took some clothes to the laundry. Some of yours too, although you just seem to wear two of them."

"Thanks." Roger just answered giving shoulders.

"Told you her name was Mimi."

Roger didn't reply. He didn't want to talk about her.

"So, what are your plans for today? It's saturday."

"I though about staying here and work on some new songs."

Mark took a deep breath repeating in his mind that he had to be tolerant with his friend. "Don't you want to grab something to eat with me and Maureen? We're going to that sushi place that you like."

"Maureen? Hadn't she dumped you?"

"We talked last night. She said she missed me." he said, a little hurt by his remark.

"Whatever. You are a sucker." Roger said bluntly starting to play the chords.

"I guess she realized her mistake." Mark insisted, looking for some sympathy that he knew was not gonna show.

"She cheated on you, then she dumped you. And you are taking her back cause she said she's sorry?"

"She said she was confused... Not exactly that she was sorry."

Roger grunted, shaking his head.

"So, why don't you come have lunch with us and tell a piece of your mind to her, instead of me, for a change?"

"No thanks. I'm broke."

"You'll have to get out of the house eventually."

"Perhaps. But not today." he ended the conversation and concentrated on the guitar.

"Did you take your medicine?"

"Yes. Mother."

Mark gave up. There was a limit to his patience, even though it took very long before Roger could reach it. He went out to meet Maureen and left his friend to indulge his self pity alone.

He did just that. Played for a few hours trying to find the chords and the words for another new song. In his mind, he needed to write one good new song before the disease took hold of him. That was the only goal keeping him from slitting his wrists like April had done six months ago.

"Hi." - a female voice coming from the window broke his concentration.

Mimi was sitting in the window ledge looking at him smiling. Her hair was wet, falling in many spirals through her back. She was dressed with a dark blue tricot pullover and black jeans.

She looked totally sober now. And although her body was totally covered, Roger thought she looked more beautiful than last night. Maybe it was the sun in her face.

"Can I come in?" she asked.

Roger hesitated. She noticed.

"I won't pass out on your couch again. I swear." she said with a lovely smile.

"Sure, get in." he finally said putting down his guitar.

She passed through the window and sat in one of the chair in the kitchen counter.

"Have you seen my note?"

"Yes." He answered standing up and staring at her.

"I just came here to apologize again. I know it must have been very upsetting for you to have to deal with a crazy drunk in the middle of the night."

"Forget about it."

"I'm Mimi." she said offering her hand to him.

"I'm Roger." he said shaking her hand. A warm feeling went through his arm when he touched her.

"Nice to meet, Roger. Then you are...Mark's?...roommate?"

"Yes." he said with a smile, amused with the way her eyes narrowed when she was guessing something. He was glad Mark wasn't there. He would probably ask Roger to stand still so he could take a shot of the first real smile Roger have given in six months.

"It's funny how you live three months in a place and don't get to know your neighbors."

"Yeah. It's funny." he merely said stopping smiling and walking a few steps back. Her perfume had reached him and it was making him remember the feeling he had last night.

"You are a musician?" she asked pointing the guitar.

"Ahn, yes. And ahn, I was working." he said trying to make her understand she had to go.

"Oh, ok. Sorry to bother you." she said standing up and getting a little bit closer to him. "Uh, I was thinking. I could buy you dinner tonight as an apology for last night."

She tilted her head and smiled in a sexy manner. That took Roger by surprise. She was asking him out on a date? That couldn't be. He felt flattered and his heart raced a little. For a moment he considered giving in to the desire he was felling. But that was just for a moment, he remembered who he was and what had happened to him.

"So, what do you say?" she asked again as he just stood there staring at her without answering. Her smile got wider and she got really close to him, looking directly into his blue eyes. Her big brown eyes where hypnotic, like they where pulling him inside them.

Roger looked away and walked around the armchair to be at a safe distance from her and her perfume.

"There's no need for that. You already apologized. It's ok." he said nervously.

"Ok. So what if I just buy you dinner, then? Without the apology. I know a very nice restaurant. Do you like italian?"

"Ahn, thanks, but no." he just said, starting to get impatient with her insistence. Rudeness and anger was the best way he knew to push people away.

She narrowed her eyes again and her smile faded.

"Do you have a girlfriend?" she asked.

"No" - he said with a snort.

"Gay?"

He snorted again shaking his head. "Just because I don't want to go out with you? You're kind of full of yourself, aren't you?"

She gave shoulders. "Sorry. People tell me I'm pretty since i'm fifteen. It kind of goes up to your head sometimes" She said without any sign of vanity or pride. "But you should know that. A pretty man like you." she smiled seductively again.

"No, I don't." he said coldly. "Now, if you'll excuse me. I would like to go back to work." he pointed the door.

Her smile faded again and she looked hurt. "Ok." she said a little embarrassed, walking to the door. "Ahn, bye. I'm really sorry to bother you again." she said before he closed the door.

She felt awful for a while, without understanding what had happened. She walked down the stairs slowly trying to figure out what she had done that got him so angry. Nothing she thought gave her the faintest clue.

On her way out of the building she met Mark by the door trying to open it with two packs of groceries in his arms. She held the door open for him.

"Hey. Thanks. Feeling better?" he asked.

"Yes. Thanks for letting me crash on your couch. I'm sorry for the inconvenience."

"Oh, there's no inconvenience. Anytime you need a place to crash you're invited." he said with a smile.

"You don't need to say that." she said with a sad smile.

"I'm serious. To prove you there's no hard feeling why don't we do this: I'm inviting some friends over tonight for dinner. You should came too?"

"I don't think that's a good idea. I believe your roommate don't ever want to see me again."

"Ah, don't mind Roger, he's always in a bad mood. You shouldn't take it personally. And he'll probably just stay inside his room tonight. Don't worry."

"Well, if it's really ok, yes, I would love too."

"Totally ok. 9 pm. Come hungry."

* * *

Mark entered the apartment and put all the groceries on the counter. He looked at his watch and decided he had exactly 3 hours to prepare the dinner. Roger was still sitting in the armchair with his guitar and just moved his head in his direction when he entered acknowledging his arrival.

"I ran into Mimi outside."

"She came in here to apologize." - he said giving shoulders, trying to look cool about it and not show to Mark how she had affected him.

"Were you rude?" - he asked while taking the groceries of the bags and preparing the thing to start cooking.

He snorted. "You should stop worrying about me."

"Yeah I should." Mark said with conviction. "That's why I invited Maureen and Collins for dinner here tonight."

"What?"

"And Collins is bringing his new boyfriend." Mark stopped and thought for a while if he should tell the rest. He decided it was best to tell everything now. "And I invited Mimi to come too."

"WHAT? NO!" Roger yelled putting his guitar down and stood up going in Marks direction. For a moment Mark thought he would punch him, but then he stopped leaving the counter between them. "You invited people here without asking me?"

"Of course. You would say no."

"You damn right I would. You're not gonna have people for dinner tonight."

"This is my house too, ok? I have the right to invite my friends over for dinner. And it would be good for you to see different people."

"I don't want to see people."

"Well, too bad. They're coming." - Mark began chopping some onions.

Roger shook his head nervously. "Mark, you're not listening to me."

"I heard every word you said. I just don't care. I'm having people over for dinner tonight. You'll just have to accept it."

Now Roger looked like he was about to cry. He turned back nervously, grabbed his guitar and marched to his bedroom. "I'll just stay in my room then."

"Fine" - Mark yelled.

"Fine" - Roger yelled back shutting the door with anger.

For the next three hours Roger stayed restless inside his room. Many thoughts crossed his mind. Leaving the house was a recurring one, but he considered that to be a victory for Mark, and he was too angry to give him the satisfaction.

He tried to continue to work but he couldn't concentrate. His mind always went back to her and the fact that she would be dinning there in a few hours. He had blown her off in the rudest way he could think of. He was sure she would never want to see his face again. Why had she accepted Marks invitation?

What if she continued to flirt with him? That thought made him nervous.

What if she moved her attentions to Mark? He tried to tell himself that that would be a relieve, but he actually got angrier with that thought. He stood up and walked around the room. He couldn't have that now. Not this feeling, not this desire, not now when he was too burned up. That kind of thing was not for him anymore. He had to concentrate on his music, on the last thing he would do before he died.

He heard a knock on the door. His heart started to race. He was sure he was going to die of a heart attack inside that room. He decided to change his clothes and leave. It would be best to show her that she had no affect over him, that way she would give up and leave him alone. And if he participated on the dinner, Mark would also leave him alone for another week, for sure.

* * *

Mark ran to the door after checking the clock and the state of the potatoes he had put in the oven.

Collins offered a bottle of wine as a gift for the host and introduced his boyfriend, Angel, how he preferred to be called.

"You're very on time, and I'm a little late." Mark said, putting the bottle on the counter and pointing the high chairs for them. "I'm just finishing the appetizers. You can open the wine" He said to Collins.

"Where's the pretty boy?" Collins asked looking at Roger's room closed door.

"He's deciding if he's going to join us." Mark just said, exchanging a concerned look with Collins.

Angel asked for the restroom leaving the two of them alone for a few minutes.

"How is he?" Collins asked more freely.

"Good, good. A little moody, but he's talking, which is a great evolution."

"Maybe I should go talk to him." Collins suggested.

"I don't think that's a good idea. I'm afraid he's gonna flip if we push him too hard. I mean, maybe he does need more time." - Mark said, he had to admit he was feeling bad for doing that do Roger.

"He needs to start having a life again. He's acting like he's already dead. We can't let him do that." Collin said.

"You two just can't let me be, can you?"

They looked back at the bedroom door and saw Roger walking in their direction.

"That's what's brothers are for, man." Collins said in a animated tone, hugging his friend.

Mark smiled when he noticed he had changed. He was wearing a tight worn off jeans, a clean white shirt and his favorite black leather jacket. His hair was messed up with some gel. He hadn't shave in two days and that gave him the perfect rock and roll look.

Angel came out of the restroom and Collins introduced them.

"Angel, this is my best friend, Roger. Roger, this is the love of my live, Angel."

Roger shook hands with Angel, a little impressed with Collins affirmation. But Collins was always dramatic that way.

"Ow, I see what you mean by pretty boy."

"Hey, behave." Collins said faking anger.

"Nice to meet you." Roger just said, a little embarrassed.

They sat at the counter. While Mark was finishing decorating some canapes, Collins poured wine for everyone and, for Mark's surprise, Roger accepted a glass.

There was another knock at the door.

"What's with everyone being on time tonight?" Mark complained taking the potatoes from the oven. "Roger, can you get the door?"

Roger just gave him a killer look. Mark nodded leaving the tray over the sink and running to the door.

"Hi, hope i'm on time." Mimi said with a lovely smile offering him a bottle of wine. "Here, my contribution for the dinner"

Mark took the bottle, thanked her and gesture for her to come in.

When Roger saw her his heart skipped a beat. It looked like every time he saw her she was more beautiful than before.

"Mimi, these are Collins and Angel. Roger you've already met. Guys, this is Mimi, our downstairs neighbor."

Collins and Angel greeted her shaking her hand. Angel added that he loved the way she'd done her hair and make up, really stylish. Roger just nodded in her direction without saying a word.

She took the glass Mark offered her and sat at the last chair at the counter. The way Roger looked at her was very intimidating, and he looked astonishing good. She felt a little embarrassed and it had been a long time since a man had made her feel embarrassed. She took a sip of the wine after toasting with Angel and took a deep breath, recovering her coolness. He would not have the satisfaction of seeing her down because of his blown off that afternoon. She would enjoy the dinner, be as full of life as she could, and he would regret his decision.

Maureen was the last to come and she arrived with a baked apple pie as dessert.

Angel and Mimi engaged in a animated conversation about clothes, the latest fashion week, and a reality show on TV called Project Runaway. Maureen dished all that as consumerism opium killing all forms of true art. Collins told Roger and Mark about how he was sacked from MIT for organizing an anarchist society project with his philosophy students.

Finally, one hour and a half after planned, Mark served the dinner. They all gathered around the center table in the leaving room. Angel and Mimi sat on the floor. Roger, Collins and Maureen on the couch and Mark on the armchair.

"So Mimi, what do you do for a living?" Maureen asked pouring more wine for everyone.

"I'm a dancer." she said.

"Uh, Broadway stile?" Asked Angel

"Not yet, but maybe someday. Right now, I work at the Cat's Scratch Club."

"The strip club?" Roger asked. Mark, Collins and Maureen looked at him reprovingly.

"Yeah." She said, unmoved. "It's a nice place, a get to dance and I don't have to get completely naked." She said, looking straight at Roger. "Just barely." she smiled teasingly.

"Uh, I would love to see that. A beautiful girl like you sure brings down the house." Said Angel.

"You're all invited." She said happily, looking directly to Roger with inviting big brown eyes. "What about the you, Roger? What do you do for a living?"

"I'm a musician. I told you." He said coldly.

"Do you have a band?" she continued deciding not let him push her down with his rudeness

"Not lately."

"Do you perform anywhere?"

"No."

"His band broke up a few months ago. But he didn't need them, right Roger?" Collins started trying to prevent Roger from being even more rude than he had already been. "He's working on some new songs before going back to the stages."

"Speaking of stages, I want to invite all of you to my new performance at the Lot next saturday. It's going to be an art protest against the closing of the 2nd street shelter." Maureen came to his help changing the subject.

Roger bottom up the rest of his wine and stood up, going to the kitchen to open another bottle. He wanted to be cool, but the way she looked at him was making him nervous. He looked at her sitting on the floor, listening to Maureen's explanation about the protest. Then she looked at him, making him know she had noticed his stare. He looked away nervous, giving his back to them. He concentrated on opening the bottle.

When he brought the bottle back the subject had shifted to Mark and his new film he was describing as a mix between Fellini's documental ways and Larry Clark's streetwise view. Collins made fun of the fact he had never been able to make a movie that someone understood. Mark said he felt hurt with that remark but expected to surprise them when his next film was ready.

The dinner went on for another hour with light conversation between all of them. The only one's that didn't talked directly to each other were Mimi and Roger, but Maureen pointed to Mark how they exchanged suspicious glances. Mark told her to leave it alone afraid she would make some remark that would make Roger mad.

After another bottle of wine and dessert, Maureen proposed they played a game. "It's a game I made up. It's kind of like poker..."

"We don't have any money to play poker, Maureen." Mark pointed.

"That's the beauty of it, we don't bet money. We bet more personal stuff, things that are valuable to us."

"We don't even have those." Roger said to her, with the first hint of good humor of the night. The wine was making him a little less moody.

"Of course you do, silly. Come on, lets try. I'll deal the cards."

She dealt five cards to each of them. Collins and Angel decided to play as one.

"Now, Mark, look at your cards and bet something you value."

"Alright, I bet this last piece of apple pie."

Everyone laughed.

"Good, now Roger. Since it's the first round everyone has to bet something."

"Alright, I bet my Journey CD." he said, picking up the CD from the rack.

"Collins, Angel?"

"I bet my Zippo." - Collins said.

"Mimi?"

"I don't have much things of value here we me." - she said twisting her nose. Roger could help to find that cute.

"That's ok, sweety. Here, write what it is that you're betting on this paper and put it on the table, whoever gets it in the end can collect with you later."

"Ok, I bet my Little Prince book."

"Ahnnnnn" - was the sound made in unison by Maureen, Collins, Angel and Mark. Roger smiled, but kept his eyes locked in his cards.

"What? It's a hell of a good book." - she said a little embarrassed.

"Ok. Now me. I bet a ticket to my performance next friday. Now, ask for cards."

They went one by one asking for the cards.

"Mark, want to bet something else?"

"No, I check."

"Roger?

"I raise with a Velvet Underground CD."

"Since he's raised, everyone has to put something else or fold."

"Ok, my last poem." - Collins said, taking a folded sheet of paper from his pocket and placing it at the table with the other items and pieces of paper.

"I fold." - Mimi said.

"I bet this indian amulet i got from my shaman." - Maureen said. "Mark?"

"I bet the last bottle of wine in the house."

"Ok, Roger. We all called you're raise, you show your cards, first."

"Three kings" he said, placing the cards on the table.

"Ah, damn it. Two pair." said Collins.

"Three queens" said Maureen.

"A pair of aces." said Mark.

"So, I won all this stuff. Now what?" Roger said taking a bite from the piece of pie.

"Now we continue. You can bet all this stuff and we still have to put on personal stuff."

They played another four round until Angel and Collins got the bottle of wine and decided to take it off of the game and open it. They were applauded by that act of generosity.

The bets remained personal stuff with few or no value to anyone but themselves, like Mark's Fellini's DVD, Roger's Ramones' shirt, and Collin's Yankees' cap. The boys betted mostly books, cds and dvds, and sentimental clothes. The girls betted books too, pieces of decoration, clothes and magazines.

After ten more rounds Collins told he was tired and check out of the game. He was able to retrieve most of his belongings and decided it was better to leave on a winning strike.

Mark said he was done too, even if more than half of his stuff were with Roger or Maureen. He knew that the two of them wouldn't care less for most of that stuff after the game was through and he would be able to retrieve them another way.

That left Mimi, Roger and Maureen playing.

They played a few rounds that Roger won. Now he was with the biggest pile of stuff. Then he said he was done.

"Last play one more." Mimi said.

"Aren't you tired of loosing to me?" he asked in friendly manner. She was surprise by that.

"I'll win this one." she said looking at him defiantly, with that teasing smile.

He felt a shiver with that look, but remained cool. "Alright, if you insist, I'll have to take another of your books."

Maureen dealt the cards and they bet the stuff they had. It had been a while since anyone had put something new in the table, but Maureen decided to change that.

"Ok, I bet everything I have."

"All right you want to play all or nothing, fine. I put everything too." said Roger.

"Me too." said Mimi.

They asked for cards and Maureen began, looking really frustrated at her cards. "Ahn, I check."

Roger laughed. "You gotta lie better on this game, Maureen. I raise: If I win, besides all the stuff I'm getting, the two of you will have to wash the dishes."

"Good one." Said Mark giving a high five to Roger. He was really happy the dinner had bee n such a success and Roger was so well.

Mimi tilted her head and smiled to her cards, then she looked straight into his eyes and said. "Alright, if I win you'll have to take me out to dinner."

There was a moment of silence and everyone looked at Roger. His smile faded and he felt uncomfortable in his skin. "That sounds a little desperate, doesn't it?" he said and his tone was back to rude and cold.

"Desperate times." She said full of confidence. "I really don't like washing dishes. So, do you take the bet or fold?"

He looked at his cards. He had a full house with three kings. He felt angry for being exposed like that to his friends. He felt Mark's, Collin's and Maureen's eyes on him, waiting for his response. If he folded, he would hear them talking about that for the rest of the week. And she would have won.

He looked at her again. He couldn't say if she was bluffing or not. But if he won the hand, she would be humiliated by being blown off by the second time.

"Alright." He said very cool. "Maureen, what's you're bet?"

"If I win you'll have to take her out to dinner."

He felt the blood running to his face. "You can't bet the same thing she did." he yelled.

"The hell I can't. I made up the game." she yelled back to him.

"Guys, chill." Mark said putting his hand on Roger's shoulder. And his successful dinner had just been flushed down the toilet.

"Alright, fine." He said angry. "What do you have?"

"Two pairs" Maureen said.

"You gonna have to wash the dishes. Full house, kings and eights." he said throwing the cards on the table and standing up.

"No, she won't." Mimi said, revealing her cards. "Straight flush."

Maureen screamed and held Mimi, kissing her. Angel laughed and clapped kissing her too in congratulation.

"What?" Roger said with disbelief. He felt like he had received a punch in the stomach and was about to faint.

Collins and Mark stood up and looked worried at him, concerned about his reaction.

"This is bullshit." he said walking away from the table and marching to his bedroom.

"You lost. Be a good sport and accept it." Maureen yelled at him.

He stopped and looked back at them. She was standing up now, looking all proud of her victory. He walked in her direction.

Mark and Collins got ready to hold him if he did something stupid.

"Alright you won." He said coldly to her, getting really close and looking straight into her eyes. "I'll take you to dinner. Tomorrow?" he asked harshly.

"I have to work tomorrow. Monday." she said calmly, without allowing him to intimidate her.

"Monday, then. Eight. Italian, right?"

She smiled. "You pick whatever you want. I just don't eat meat."

"Funny. I would have mistaken you for a carnivore." he said with sarcasm.

"Roger." Mark warned him.

"So, see you Monday." She said ignoring his remark, too happy with her victory. Gave her back to him saying goodbye to Maureen, Collins and Angel, and thanking Mark once again for the invitation and the dinner.

Collins and Angel also said their goodbyes and left with Mimi.

Maureen looked at Mark. "I'm not doing the dishes, he lost." she said pointing at Roger. "I'm going too." She said kissing him on the lips.

"I thought you would sleep here tonight." Mark said, really disappointed, holding her by the waist.

"Oh, baby. I don't think that's a good idea. We might start confusing things."

Roger snorted.

"What?" she asked him.

"Nothing. Just glad I'm not the only sucker living in this apartment."

"If you want to say something, say it to my face, don't hide behind your bitter sarcasm." she challenge him.

"You know what, it's about time..."

"ROGER!" Mark stopped him.

"No, let him speak his mind."

Mark looked at Roger begging for him to don't say another word. "Just ignore him." he said pulling Maureen's face back to him.

Roger shook his head. "You two do whatever you want. I'm going to sleep." he said going into his room and closing the door behind him.

"I think I preferred him when he wasn't talking."

"Give him a break. He did very well tonight. He was almost pleasant at times"

"Yes, when he wasn't trying to be unpleasant to Mimi. You know, I think he likes her. And I like her attitude towards him."

"She's a little pushy, ain't her?"

"Well, a little. But I think he needs a push to get out of his funk. And they look good together."

"We look good together." Mark said sweetly kissing her.

"Ahn, baby. That's sweet."

"Stay with me tonight." he asked.

Maureen ran her hands through his hair for a while, considering his invitation. "Don't you think Roger will mind?"

"I don't care what Roger thinks."

"Alright then." she said kissing him deeply on the lips.

**Sorry for the mistakes. English is not my first language, though that's not an excuse. But I haven't found anyone to read it before I publish yet. Thanks for the reviews.**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer. Again: don't own anything, just write cause i get a kick out of making characters do more then what they were originally conceived to do.**

Roger got out of his bedroom and walked to the kitchen.

"You're going out wearing _this_?" - Maureen asked sitting on the couch with Mark's laying his head on her lap.

"What's wrong with this?"

"Isn't it the same clothes you've been wearing for the past two days?"

"The shirt is different." he said grabbing a beer.

"You're gonna make quite an impression." she said. "How old is that shirt anyway?"

"I'm not trying to make an impression. I'm taking her out because I lost a bet."

"Yeah, it must be really awful to be forced to spend some time with a girl as hot as that."

"If you like her so much why don't_ you_ take her out?"

"When she realizes you're a waste of time I'll give it a try." Maureen said sounding more serious than Mark would like. "Are you really not even a bit interested in her?"

Roger hesitated.

"What difference does it make?" he was aiming for indifferent, but it sounded pitiful.

"It makes all the difference in the world." Mark said, raising his head and looking at Roger.

"No it doesn't, Mark. Cause I have nothing to offer her. This, " he hit his chest a couple of times. "this shell that she's interest in, is empty. There's nothing in here anymore. No fire, no passion. Just this damn virus that's going to take hold of the little that's left soon enough."

"You don't mean that." Mark said determined. "You know that's not true. There's a lot you can..."

Roger interrupted him. "Don't, Mark, don't bother." He looked at his watch, grabbed his wallet from the counter and walked to the door. "I'm doing what you all want: going out. That should suffice you for tonight. Don't give me anymore of you're pity talk, ok?"

He left the apartment and rushed down the stairs, taking a deep breath before knocking on her door.

After a few moments he heard the sound of something crashing inside, Mimi's voice cursing and then the sound of the lock being undone.

"Hi. You're on time." she smiled, looking a little flushed. "I'm not ready, can you wait just a few minutes?"

She walked back in leaving the door open.

"Can I not?" he asked walking slowly inside.

"That was a rhetorical question." she said disappearing through a door that he assumed was her bedroom.

The apartment was smaller than his and Mark's. It was a little messy but it had a very feminine style with lots of colors and patterns. He sat on the white couch to wait for her.

"Where are we going?" she scream from the other room.

"A place nearby."

"Are we going to walk or take a cab?"

"Walk"

She went silent and after a few minutes, then appeared again, wearing a simple black dress with blue pattern and high hills. Her her was loose and full of waves. "I'm ready. Shall we?" She said with a triumphantly smile.

Once again he had that impression that she was more beautiful than he remembered. She waited for a compliment, but he didn't said anything.

They left the building and he lead the way.

"I was afraid you wouldn't show." she said, breaking the silence between them.

"I always pay my debts." he said seriously.

After a few block they arrived at a Pub. Roger asked for a table and the waiter pointed something in the corner.

"It's not really a restaurant." she pointed.

"You didn't said it had to be one. You just said I could pick whatever I wanted and that you didn't eat meat. They have a veggie burger, and some salads." he said without taking his eyes from the menu.

"Well, I guess I should be thankful you didn't take me to a hot dog stand."

"I considered that. But I don't know any hot dog stands with veggie hot dogs."

"Very funny."

"Are you two ready to order?" asked the waiter

"Yes. I'll have the veggie burger, a caprese salad and a Mojito." she said.

"I'll have a cheeseburger, french fries and a beer."

He left them alone and there was an awkward silence.

"So, how did you and Mark meet?" she started, trying to break the silence.

"Haven't you realized I'm not a personal question kind of man?" he said coldly.

"Ok." she replied tolerant. He wasn't going to push her alway so easily. "What do you propose we talk about then?"

He just looked away.

"We can't stay the whole dinner without saying a word to each other."

"_You _can't." he replied.

She took a deep breath and tried again. "So ask _me_ something."

"Ok, why are you insisting with this?" he said, leaning in her direction.

"With what?"

"With...this. With forcing me to go out with you when i said i wasn't interest."

"I'm stubborn. And spoiled. And I'm not used to be blown off. Thought that was obvious." she said with a cheeky smile. He leaned back again and snorted with impatience.

After a few minutes of silence she reached out and grabbed his hand. "Since you're not going to tell me anything about you I'm going to read your palm." She said holding his right hand.

He was taken by surprise by that action but held the urge to pull his hand back. "You're going to what?" Her touch was warm and the way she was running her finger through his palm was making shivers run down his spine.

"Read your palm. I come from a long line of gypsies."

"Really?" he asked with sarcasm.

"Well, no. But I'm sure there may be at least one gypsy in my family line. Uhn."

"What?"

"You have a very parted heart line."

"And that means what?"

"That you're a man of many lovers." she said looking back at him teasingly.

He just raised his eyebrows to her. No, he wasn't a man of many lovers. Maybe before April. Not anymore.

She looked back to his hand.

"You're head line is very deep. That means you think too much." She ran her the tip of her finger very softly through his skin and looked back at him smiling. "That's dangerous. You should listen to your heart more." his heart started to race, her touch was burning him, and he felt the urge to kiss her. He looked away and pulled back his hand.

"Wait." she said holding his hand a little longer and looking at it again. "Uhn" Her smile faded.

"Now what?"

"You have a short life line" she said casually. "That means, you have to life fast and enjoy every minute, cause you're going to die young. Like me."

He felt the blood running out of his face and a lump on his throat. He pulled his hand and looked away again.

"Are you ok? You got pale." she laughed nervously. "Hey, i'm kidding. I learned all that in a magazine. I'm not serious. Jesus, you _really_ don't have any sense of humor."

"Excuse me." he said, getting up.

"Where are you going?"

"To the bathroom." he said rushing away from her.

Roger kicked the door of the bathroom open and placed his both hands on the sink. He couldn't breath and his heart was pounding hard on his chest. He threw cold water on his face and took a deep breath. He was feeling a mixture of panic, shame, anger and desire. It was like she knew exactly what to say to drive him mad. He wanted to leave, run away, get back to the apartment e hide inside his bedroom forever. At the same time, he wanted to get back to the table and tell her the truth, tell her about the disease. But he feared she would stop being interest in him if he did. But she said she was going to die young too. What could she possibly mean by that?

Meanwhile, Mimi was sure the dinner had gone worst than she had anticipated. He was cold and rude all the time, and the two times she thought she saw desire in his eyes could have just been her over inflated and self centered imagination. She felt tears forming in her eyes, when she realize that he probably had left and she would have to pay for the food and drinks that had just arrived. That was definitely the most humiliating situation she had ever been in her life. The worst part was that she had done that to herself. He said he wasn't interest. Several times. Why had she insisted?

"Mimi?" she heard a voice calling her.

She looked up and saw a familiar face that just made her sure she was inside a nightmare.

"Benny?"

"What are you doing here?" he asked smiling sheepishly

"Eating." she said trying to look cool. "With a friend." she added a little unsure, because there was a strong possibility that her 'friend' would never come back from the restroom.

"Oh" his smile faded. "You didn't return my calls."

"There was nothing to say anymore, Benny."

"I disagree. We need to talk."

She shook her head sucking the straw of her drink, wishing it was something stronger.

"Please, leave me alone." she said angry.

"Is everything ok?"

"Roger?" Mimi said genuinely happy and relieved with his return.

Benny looked at him with surprised and sighed. "Roger. I heard you weren't getting out of the apartment."

"Guess I am. You two know each other?" he asked coldly.

"Yes. I met Mimi a few months ago. I was the one who offered her the flat bellow yours."

"You two know each other, too?" she asked a little nervous.

"I used to share the flat with Roger and Mark."

"Before he got married to a rich girl and moved to a better part of town. How's Muffy?"

"Allison. She's fine." he said embarrassed by the judgment in Mimi's eyes and Roger's tone. "As a matter of fact I'm going to meet her now. I'll tell her you said hi." he said, looking at his watch. "Nice to see you're better, man. Mimi I'll call you." he finished leaving them alone again.

Roger sat down and looked at her. "How did you two meet?" He tried to sound cool and hold back that slight sting of jealousy inside. Benny was rich, good looking, without scruples and healthy.

"I don't want to talk about him." she said, finishing her drink and asking for another.

That made him even more jealous. "You know now how obnoxious it is when you don't want to talk about something and someone asks about it." he said aggressively.

That made her angry for a moment. But then she remembered how happy she was he hadn't just gone away without saying a word that she decided it wasn't worthy to let things go sour again because of Benny.

She smiled. "That's different, but since you insist: I met Benny at work, we went out a couple of times but I dumped him three months ago when I found out he was married."

He snorted, but felt relieved with the answer.

"See, it's not that hard to answer questions. Even complicated ones." she teased.

"Guess not." he said indifferent.

"What did he mean about you not wanting to leave the apartment?" she tried.

"Look, I got some baggage ok. I don't want to be rude, but I don't have any answers for you tonight."

"I got baggage, too. We just need to find out if they match." she smiled sheepishly again.

He just sighed.

"Ok, let me guess..."

"I rather you didn't."

It was Mimi who sighed this time. "Ok, I give up." He looked at her without understanding. "Ask for the check, we can go now."

"You didn't finish your burger." he said. He hadn't touched his but he wasn't hungry.

"I lost my appetite and I don't want to insist on this anymore. You're right, I shouldn't force you to do something you don't want to. Let's go." She stood up and walked to the exit door.

He left some notes on the table and went after her.

They walked silently back to their building and Roger began to feel awful. He didn't understood why. That was what he wanted, wasn't it? That she left him alone. But now he didn't want to leave her like that.

"Look, I'm sorry." He began when they got to the building. "It's not you..."

"Please don't finish that sentence."

They climbed the stairs silently, she jumped two steps at a time, getting to her floor before him.

"That's me." she said. "Thanks for everything. I won't bother you anymore. Good Night." She walked to her door leaving him standing on the stairs.

"Mimi." he called.

That was the first time he said her name since they met. She stopped and looked back at him. The tears she was holding since the restaurant were already forming in her eyes.

"What did you mean when you said you were going to die young too?" he asked walking in her direction.

She snorted and looked away from him. "You're kidding, right? _Now_ you want to talk?"

"Just answer the question."

She looked at him and he saw a single tear fall from her eyes. He felt guilty.

"You know" she begin with confidence, despite the tears. "I normally just tell that to someone when I consider the possibility of having sex with the person. Don't think that's the case here, but since I probably will never see you again, what the hell." she took a deep breath, trying to control herself and stop crying. "I'm HIV positive."

His heart started to race and he looked at her amazed.

"You're pale again. Gonna run away now?" she said with mockery.

But he didn't run. Instead, he walked to her and kissed her.

Her mouth opened to him despite her surprise, and he pushed her against the door of her apartment. Unable to form any coherent thought, Mimi just threw her arms around his neck and adjusted her hips against him.

He pulled his lips away from hers and started kissing her neck while his hands moved up her legs, under her dress. That was when she placed her palms against his chest and whispered for him to stop. It took him a great effort of self control to do that.

She pulled him and he stepped back breathing heavily, felling his whole body pounding.

"What was that?" she asked breathless.

"I'm sorry." he said.

"That's not an answer."

He took a deep breath to regain control of himself. "I'm totally screwed up. I don't know how to begin answer you."

"Try." she said.

"I wanted to push you away, because I was... because I didn't want to get involved with anyone, and you... but you..." he looked down to his hands trying to find the words. "I thought you would not be interest in me if you knew... And I didn't want you to know...That's why I treated you like that. I'm sorry."

"Know what?"

"I got AIDS, too." he said and it felt like a heavy load has been lifted from him.

"You?" she said with an incredulous smile.

"Me." he said. "I'm going to die young too, just like you guessed."

She laughed.

"That's not funny." he said serious, a little embarrassed by her reaction.

She covered her mouth, holding her laugh. "It's not. You're right." she said, stepping closer to him. "I laugh when I'm nervous." she looked into his eyes and kissed him softly on the lips again, pulling him by the jacket. "Want to come in?" she invited with a whisper.

He smiled and just let himself be pulled inside her apartment.

**Again, thanks for reviews.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Disclaimer: don't own any of the rent characters or stories, clearly. the dialogs seemed so much better in my head. Not much news I guess. Just wrote it cause i had to. **

When he heard the sound of the door opening, Mark adjusted his camera and started shooting.

"Hey." Roger said a little surprised, entering the apartment.

"Hey, good afternoon, how was the dinner?" Mark asked following him around the apartment, with a gigantic grim on his face.

"You're filming me?" He asked pouring some cold water in a glass.

"Ignore the camera, just answer the question."

"It was fine." Roger said a little annoyed. He grabbed his guitar and walked to his bedroom. Mark followed.

"Would you care to elaborate on that?"

"What do you want me to say, Mark?"

"O, I don't know. Maybe everything that happened in the last..." he looked at his watch "...15 hours. Don't hold back the details, this is a NC-17 movie."

Roger looked away from the camera but couldn't hold a smile.

"Wait, wait. Can you hold that for a while? I'm just going to zoom in and show the folks at home that you still got teeth."

He wanted to look angry but his smile just got wider. "You're being ridiculous." Roger said sitting on his bed.

"And you're being a pain in the ass. Nothing's different. Now, give me something: did you sleep you her?"

"There wasn't much sleeping involved in what we did." he said with a smug smile. "Now cut the camera."

"Alright, alright. Camera off. Now tell me everything."

"She's ok. More than ok." Roger began.

"And how did you manage not to push her away completely?"

He snorted. "Well, she's stubborn and relentless. Almost more than you."

"That's the only kind of people who can stand you. Now, tell me the details. Where did you take her to dinner? What did you talk about?"

"I took her to that pub in avenue A."

"That place is crap."

"Well, yes, that was kind of the point. I didn't want her to like going out with me." he said a little sadly. He felt stupid now. "But she was cool with everything. Even when I told her I wasn't interest."

"Why did you do that, when it was clearly a lie?"

"You know why." Roger said a little nervous and serious, and Mark feared he would shut down again.

"Ok. What happened then?"

"Eventually she gave up. I don't know exactly what I said but it was something bad and she just said that I was right and she shouldn't force me to do what I didn't want to do and walked away from the place."

"You went after her, right?" Mark asked confused.

"Yes. I felt bad for treating her like that. She was sweet all the time and I was an asshole. I chased her back here."

"Then what?"

"In the pub, she had said something that had caught my attention. She said she was going to die young." He was really serious now. "When we got here I asked her what she meant by that."

"And what did she mean?"

"She's got HIV too."

"What?" Mark asked surprised. He was unsure of how he should feel. He felt bad for Mimi, and for himself, because he was tired of finding out more people with that damn disease. He felt bad for Roger too, because he knew how hard it was for him to even mention the thing.

Roger nodded. "Yeah. And when she said that, for some reason, I didn't want to push her away anymore." he paused, a little embarrassed. "I kissed her."

Mark smiled and Roger smiled too.

"I was sure she was going to slap me. But she didn't. She invited me in. And then we talked, a lot. I told her everything." He paused again, visibly touched. "And she told me everything about her. And we..." He smiled again looking at Mark."...well, that part is rated."

"Ok." Mark said really happy for his friend. "I have a good enough imagination."

Roger smiled again remembering his night with Mimi, feeling strange in his own skin. Unsure if he should be happy or afraid of what happened.

"So when are you going to see her again?" Mark asked.

"I don't know." Roger said a little serious. "She said she had something she needed to do now, then she have to go to work." he said.

There was a knock on the door and they both looked puzzled by it. Mark ran to the open it.

"Hey, Mark" - Benny said walking inside the apartment.

"Benny? Ahn, hi." Mark asked a little embarrassed. "What are you doing here?" They haven't talked to Benny in months. Ever since his marriage, which was before April's suicide.

Benny smiled smugly removing his gloves and sitting at the kitchen counter, making himself at home. "I came to collect the rent."

"What rent?" asked Roger standing on his bedroom door.

"Oh, hi Roger. How was your dinner with Mimi last night?"

Mark looked at Roger confused. How did Benny know about dinner?

"It was fine."

"Mimi is a charming girl, isn't she? Do you know she works at the Cat Scratch Club?"

"Yeah. So?" He asked aggressively walking in Benny's direction.

"You should go see her. She put on quite a show. I mean, with a body like that, you should see the way men go crazy about her. And she likes to tease them." His tone was cynical and condescending. "But I bet you already know how much of a tease she is."

"What's that got to do with you? Last time I checked you were married."

"Nothing. Just making conversation." He said. "Well, the rent."

"What are you talking about? Rent?" Mark asked worried about the animosity between the two men. He considered it best not to insist on the Mimi's subject.

"This year's rent, which I let slide. Until now."

"When you bought the building you said we were golden. You never mentioned anything about rent." Mark said.

"Yeah, when we were friends." Roger completed sitting on the couch. "Do you even remember you used to live here with us?"

"This building is an investment and I have to make it profitable." Benny just answered.

"Spoke like a real mogul." Roger said with sarcasm. "You're wasting your time, we're broke."

"Then you'll have to pack."

"You're going to evict us? This is absurd. We're friends." Mark screamed in shock.

"Friends? When was the last time you called me for anything? Ever since my marriage you two have been treating me like I'm dirt."

"Well, you've changed." Roger said.

"Yes, I did change. I grew up and moved on. I'm going to build a cyber arts studio on the lot next door and become a producer. That's what we used to dream about. Remember? You would write songs, make films and we were all going to be very rich." He stood up. "Well, that's not going to happen to you if you don't change too."

He paused and pointed at Mark "I bet you still haven't found a way to make money with your incomprehensible films. And all the money you make with your occasional jobs you give to Maureen or to him." He turned to Roger. "And I bet you haven't written a decent song in months and you still spends all the money you _don't_ make on drugs."

"For your information, I've been clean for six months." Roger said, he didn't comment on the other remark because it was very much true.

"Oh, that's funny." Benny said a little surprised. "I thought that was what had brought you and Mimi together."

Roger frowned. "What do you mean?"

Benny gave him another condescending smile. "Well, let's just say she really likes to feel good now and then." He started moving to the door. "You have a week to come up with the money or you'll have to go. See you next Tuesday." he said, leaving the apartment.

"Can you believe that guy?" Mark snorted.

Roger didn't answer. He wasn't worried about Benny or the rent anymore.

He remembered the first night Mimi showed at his door and how he thought she was more than drunk. The other times they met she looked ok, but he remembered that in the morning she was shivering a little too much. She was without heat and her apartment was freezing, but now he realized that it wasn't just the cold making her shiver.

Knowing that about Mimi made him think about April and he felt anxious about it. He didn't know if he could be in another relationship like that.

"What are we going to do?" Mark tried again.

"We're not going to do anything. He's bluffing." he said angry going back to his bedroom, grabbing his guitar and beginning to tune it again. He had to concentrate on his song and stop thinking about Mimi or drugs.


	4. Chapter 4

It was almost midnight and Mimi went up the fire escape to Roger's apartment. She knew that the right move was probably to wait for him to look for her. But she wasn't much a girl of right moves. And she just couldn't stop thinking about him. After he had opened up and told her about his disease, his dead girlfriend and everything that he's been through these past months, her attraction for him just grew stronger. She told him many things about her, too. About her father and about how her life as a stripper was a way up from several bad things she's been through.

One thing she left out. Well, not left out since it wasn't actually a thing to worry about. After he told her about his withdraw period she felt it was unnecessary to tell him she was dying for a shot. She thought she could wait a while longer, but in the morning she began to feel really bad. After the shot she took before work, she felt better, and all she wanted was to be with him, talk, kiss, and make love to him again.

He was sitting in the couch with his guitar, looking serious and sad.

"Hi" she said.

He looked at her taken by surprised and smiled sadly. "Oh, Hi."

Not exactly the reception she was waiting for.

"You know, I almost couldn't work today." she said, walking in and crawling in the couch until she was facing him really closely. He didn't say anything; just looked away a little embarrassed then looked back at her. "You know why?"

"Why?" he said not smiling anymore, looking straight into her eyes.

"Cause my legs got shaky every time I remembered what you did to me last night." She whispered and leaned to kiss him. He hesitated for a moment then he kissed her back.

He put his guitar down and pulled her to his lap, kissing her with more intensity and urgency, and she felt a rush of happiness. Almost as good as the rush from the shot.

They made out for a long while, until he broke the kiss and just stared at her seriously. She smiled widely running her hands through his hair. "Want to go downstairs?" she invited.

He just looked at her thoughtfully. She saw sadness and maybe some doubt in his eyes and felt unsure. An uncontrollable fear of being blown off again made her body tense and her smile subside.

"Why are you so serious?" she said, running her hands through his chest. "Thinking too much again?" She said with a sassy smile kissing him.

He let himself be kissed then hugged her, pressing his head against her chest. She held him tight. "What's wrong?" she asked carefully, scared of the possible answer.

He leaned back and ran his hand through her hair. "You're very beautiful." he said, smiling again. "It's impossible to resist you." he said.

She smiled although she knew he was dodging her question.

"I couldn't stop thinking about last night either." he said picking her up and laying her in the couch kissing her deeply. "My room is closer." He said, with a wicked smiled.

* * *

Her body felt warm and soft under the sheets, wrapped in his arms. She was sleeping soundly and the slow beating of her heart soothed him. The intense happiness he was feeling scared him. His rational mind insisted it was too soon to feel that intensely about someone he barely knew.

Her arm was over his chest and he could see the needle marks. That made him remember April and all the bad feelings and thoughts that came with her memory. He also remembered his own addiction. The craving for a shot was a ghost whispering in the back of his skull. He knew it wasn't real, that his body didn't need anything anymore; he's been off for a long time now. But he feared the proximity of the stuff would cause a relapse.

He shoved those thoughts aside and concentrated on the warmth of her body and her heartbeat to guide him to sleep.


End file.
